Attachment Therapy vs. Traditional Couples Counselling: What’s the Difference?
When searching for marriage or couples therapy, you might be wondering what’s better for your relationship: traditional couples counselling or attachment-based therapy. At Healing Voices Psychotherapy, we value both equally. But each approach has a specific purpose and it's important to figure out which one is best for you! The difference lies in how deep each method goes and the longevity of results. We emphasize the importance of healing the root of conflicts, not just to communicate better.
Let’s look at the differences between the two, so you can decide the method that supports your relationship.
Traditional Couples Counselling: Emphasis on Communication
Traditional couples counselling focuses on practical skills such as conflict resolution strategies, managing household responsibilities, using “I” statements and rebuilding cooperation. These emphasize communication skills and logistical challenges. For example, you might feel like your partner doesn’t hear you or doesn’t see the unequal division of chores in the house.
These relationships are for the most part stable but struggle with what to say. The downside to this approach is that it doesn’t always dig deep enough to change how each other feels.
Attachment-Based Couples Therapy: Healing at the Core
Attachment-based therapy goes much deeper and focuses on exploring the relational patterns that keep couples stuck in negative cycles. This approach helps identify and heal attachment wounds, help each other understand their attachment style, rebuild a secure relationship, facilitate emotional safety and repair trust. This could look like a repeat argument that never resolves itself, or when one partner attempts to bridge the subject, the other partner might pull back and isolate.
The focus is digging deeper than what the fight was about and understanding why the fight feels so painful. To understand what you and your partner need emotionally is the first step towards reconnecting from a place of vulnerability and trust.
Which Approach Is Right For You?
Maybe you’ve tried traditional couples counselling or know someone else who’s tried it. Each methodology is not one size fits all, it’s best to find what’s right for you and your relationship. And understanding the differences is a step in the right direction.
Traditional couples counselling might be a good fit if:
You want to fine tune your communication skills
You and your parent want to improve conflict resolution skills
You’re facing challenges such as division of labour or parenting
You’re looking for short-term and skill-based support
Attachment therapy might be beneficial if:
You feel like you and your partner are stuck in conflict loops
Past conflicts or traumas are affecting your bond
You want long-term intimacy and security
You want to know more about your attachment styles
One or both partners feel unheard, anxious or shut out
Ready for a relationship that feels secure, loving, and lasting?
If you're looking for long term solutions that get to the root cause of your relational difficulties, then attachment-based therapy might be what you’ve been missing. Our certified psychotherapists here at Healing Voices Psychotherapy can help you grow your bond with your partner by healing what’s beneath the surface. With our help, you can work towards a more secure, loving and lasting relationship from the comfort of your own living room. Book your first complimentary 15-minute consultation today!
